Why its Important for Everyone to Learn About Gaslighting
By the time I first learned about gaslighting, it was too late. I was already lost in the dark abyss of self-doubt and crazy-making confusion. So, let’s start here:
What is gaslighting?
In essence, gaslighting is a manipulative tactic used to make someone question their reality. It’s a form of brainwashing at its best. And torture at its worst.
Gaslighting is a form of slow drip poison.
It would be easier to wrap our heads around gaslighting if we renamed it “gas leaking.” Because, much like a gas leak, gaslighting works slowly, poisoning your mind over time as you internalize its effects. It can show up in many forms, but four ways I’ve personally experienced gaslighting include:
- Victim reversal- flipping issues back onto another
- Scapegoating- projecting feelings and behaviors onto another
- Disengaging- refusing to respond to an issue or engage in a conversation; silent treatment
- Opposing- Questioning someone’s memory; minimizing their feelings and experiences; making them out to be “wrong”
If you notice, all of these have to do with the person gaslighting refusing to take accountability. Which means to continue a relationship with that person, the one being gaslit has to be willing to take all accountability.
Gaslighting is only dangerous when it goes undetected.
Also similar to a gas leak, gaslighting only poses a threat if you’re unaware of it or do nothing about it. As I later discovered, early signs that I was experiencing gaslighting included:
- Loss in confidence; extreme self-doubt
- Loss of identity
- Emotional numbness
Had I known these to be signs of emotional manipulation earlier on, I could have responded more appropriately and possibly avoided a great deal of pain.
The best way to avoid gaslighting is to understand what makes you susceptible in the first place.
I believe this is truly the most important piece of the puzzle, but you know… atomic essay. Topic for another day? Let me know!
Read this post and more on my Typeshare Social Blog
